Holidays

This topic contains 3 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  Lelainia 6 years, 5 months ago.

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  • December 27, 2012 at 4:28 pm #8355

    jgerb87
    Participant

    Hey Everyone!

    I have been thinking a lot lately about this holiday season, because it will be the last year that we are able to take my mom out to celebrate the holidays with us.  She has become too difficult to move, and far to heavy now that she has a proper eating schedule.   We put my mom into a home almost two years ago now, and getting her around into the houses and up the stairs is getting too physically demanding.

    My name is Jan.  I am twenty-five years old, and my mom is the member of my family with MS.  I guess my story starts with my mom, at my age when she was diagnosed with MS.  She was the sixth of eight kids, born in Wakaw, Saskatchewan.  She grew up in Saskatoon and graduated from Nutana Collegiate in Saskatoon in 1976.  She was a member of her senior girls basketball team from grade nine to twelve, and was also an amazing artist.  She could paint and draw almost anything.  She loved art.  When I was young,  I learned that she loved to knit.  She would knit my blankets and sweaters, even slippers.  It is easy to say I love my mom, and I miss the things that she used to to.  I was fortunate.  She did get to drive me to the babysitters for a little while.

    I love my mom, and would love for her to still be able to come to her sister’s for Christmas or Thanksgiving, but it is becoming so difficult.  The care home needs to use a machine to transfer her from her bed to her chair and vise verse.  It bums me out that I have to leave her behind because of this, but…

    Can someone please help me with the but.  I feel guilty about the but.

    December 28, 2012 at 6:59 pm #8359

    Lelainia
    Participant

    I am sorry your family is struggling with this. It’s hard when someone you love has to be in a care home in order to have the best possible quality of life.

    My grandfather was in a care home for several years. What we used to do was open our gifts early in the morning and then go over to the nursing home to give him gifts and spend time with him on Xmas day. We would arrange with the nursing home to have the noon meal with him (it was a nominal charge) and we’d eat together in a private dining room. The staff were very accommodating and often commented that they wished other residents’ family members would do this. Sometimes we’d take our own food on birthdays or other holidays, so Gramps could enjoy a special treat or just a home cooked meal he was used to. Perhaps it is possible to arrange for something like this with your mum’s care home?

    It’s likely always going to pull at your heart strings that things have changed but with a little creativity, maybe you and your family can adopt some new holiday traditions and continue to make beautiful memories with your mum, in a way that works for all of you.

    December 30, 2012 at 1:43 pm #8380

    jgerb87
    Participant

    Oh my goodness!  I can’t tell you how much you hit the nail on the head.  I know that the next round of holidays are not for another year, but getting these things figured out before the times get busy.

    I had no idea how I could make the holidays easier for everyone, but make sure that no one was left out.  I love how you brought everyone together for the gifts and dinner!  Maybe we could do something like that with my family.

    Thank you so much!

    December 31, 2012 at 8:43 pm #8387

    Lelainia
    Participant

    Glad I could help! One thing my son enjoyed doing was bringing some of his favourite gifts (toys) to show my Gramps. They had a ball playing remote control cars together or building with legos. My son always seemed to instinctively choose things that they could share, even though Gramps had limited mobility. I’d watch them interact and they’d both have a big grin on their faces. I am so glad that they had the chance to make those memories together.

    I wish you and your mum a beautiful 2013.

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